Thursdays

I have not Blogged in a while, I have been debating if I should even write on the topic. Writing is healing and for so many people blogging is a way to work out their thoughts and feelings.



For most of my married life I loved Thursdays. I looked forward to every Thursday meeting up with Josh, my parents and my brother Joe for Nepalese food. After I had my girls Thursday was a day of rest and refueling for me at my local Mother of Preschoolers group.


This year, it was on a Thursday that I surprised Josh with the exciting and joyful news that we were expecting our third child.

It was a Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, that we said goodbye to our pregnancy and our little baby. Brokenhearted

Today is our forth Thursday without our baby. Even though we are moving forward, and everyday of the week gets a little easier and we are starting to make new plans for our family, Thursday still stings. On Thursday that part of my heart that belongs to my third child feels a little more empty. Especially this Thursday, December 22nd, a date that was etched in my heart and etched on my baby brothers headstone twenty-two years ago.

It was on a Thursday that my youngest brother met my youngest child, before me, in Heaven.

The Cheese Stands Alone

I think for most people, when you have your second child you think how far apart your children will be the day you come home from the hospital. Hannah was 20 months old when we brought home our 6 lb 10 oz little Madalyn. We focused so much on how far apart they were that day, never did I think about the fact they they are 20 months apart and that means I am going to have one child leaving for Kindergarten the same year I have the second going into preschool. Tuesday, August 30th was the first time in the last 5 1/2 years that my children went off to do their own things and I was left standing alone.

We are so pleased with the preschool we chose for our girls. Madalyn had no problem sitting right down in class and starting her pudding painting. It almost felt like she has being preparing herself for her first day of preschool ever since the first day we dropped Hannah off, 2 years ago. Her classroom felt so warm and welcoming and chatting with her teacher was like talking to a friend I haven't seen for a couple months.



Madalyn's class is a total of 4 girls, and from the moment class started all four of them joined together as if they had always been friends. I think it is going to a fantastic year with these girls, I just need to keep reminding Madalyn they she is not going to an all girls school, it just happen that there are no boys in her class.





Off she goes. I officially have both my children in school.

I wasn't left standing alone right away, Josh did exactly what every husband should do when the the youngest goes off to school, he took me out to breakfast. Just to two of us in the middle of the week out to breakfast <3. He knew just what to do to take the sting out of the day and I am so grateful that he works in an office that is understanding and values family so much that Josh was able to come with me to both of the girls first days and we faced these new milestones as a family.

I have a Kindergartener

Today started at 6 am. Hannah sprung out of bed quicker than she would Christmas morning. Talking a mile a minute and she was dressed and shoes buckled before I even had my shower turned on. Officially today was orientation day. It is the only day that she would go to school this week, to be evaluated and get a feel of her classroom with only 4 other kids before the real deal starts on Monday with 20 kids.



Dropping her off went so much better than I thought. There were no tears and we were able to take our time with her and wait until she said she was ready for us to go. She was a little shy with her teacher, but still made eye contact and shook her hand, so we felt really good about the fit.





I met her at the front door three hours later. She was excited to show me the necklace she made and thrilled to tell me that she crossed all the monkey bars with out help.

As much as Madal and I missed her today, I know Kindergarten is going to be great for her and I am embracing this new season more and more every day.

After pulling up in our drive way and looking back at my little elementary schooler, I knew half day kindergarten was the right choice for us : )

Sorry Bears

So I have been reading this site for a few weeks now called sanjuanparent.com. I have no idea who mans the site, but I would love to meet her. San Juan Parent does a great job of keeping track of all the family friendly events and activities across Montrose, Ridgway, Silverton, Ouray and Telluride. I think what a value the most, are her blog entries (imagine that!) of what her family or friends family have done in the area. There has been a few things that she writes about that we have done as a family or an event that we went to as well, but it is fantastic to read about the things we have been missing out on.

Keystone Loop is a 3 mile hike that San Juan Parent writes about. We gave it a try with my cousin Tim and his wife Amy, it was the perfect morning hike for our girls. There were fun bridges to cross and mining remains to explore and a beautiful river to follow. The one thing that wasn't written about in the article was the surprise at the end of the hike......



Raspberries!!

Everywhere you looked there were raspberry bushes. It was so perfect, hanging out in Telluride, shaded by gorgeous aspen trees, picking more wild raspberries than we knew what to do with.





We where able to pack out a good chuck of potential bear food and went back to Tim and Amy's for some dark chocolate brownies, fresh whipped cream and our harvest of berries.

No More Excuses

This Saturday, August 13th, will mark my eleventh year living in Colorado. For eleven years I have gazed up at Mt. Sneffels. At 14156 ft elevation it is the tallest and most prominent mountain in the San Juan Mountain Range.



Sneffels to me, no matter how ridiculous the name, has always been the symbol of Western Colorado. And way back in my earlier years, before Josh and I had kids, back when we drove around on a yellow crotch rocket with matching helmets, I had the most amazing picture of Mt. Sneffels that Josh's friend had shot, tattooed on my back. It feels like a lifetime ago and I am indeed a completely different person now, but I have never regretted my tattoo choice. I love where I live and Sneffels is the perfect picture of that.

The only thing I did regret was never being able for one reason or another to climb to the top of this grand peek. I had to work the first time Josh climbed it, and I said I'll go next year. The next year I got pregnant and the idea of climbing Sneffels drifted away.

I decide 12 hours before getting up and leaving for the trail head that I would climb. I silenced my own voices that said, "I am under prepared and incapable" or "I am not really feeling up to it". No excuses

We left at 6:30 am for the trail head and the drive up was perfect.



We climbed up the South Ridge of Mt Sneffles. We followed the trail to Blue Lakes Pass than went right and spent the next two hours climbing and climbing.







As always pictures do not do it justice and the camara never came out when our route got really intense.

The way up there were times I felt so strong, and there were times that I felt to exposed on the rock and there were a lot of times I felt nothing but the adrenalin. Amazing feeling it was.



Summit!!!







The we climbed down the Southeast Couloir, which is the standard and more common route to get both up and down Sneffels.







Finally!!!

My Inspiration Part 2- This Life to Live

To explain this where I am coming from on this post, I need to take you back a little over 2 months ago.

June 6th was nothing day for us in the Freed house, I took a very late shower, made my shopping list, started rounding up kids and sorting through coupons and packing my car with my re-useable bags...Bla Bla Bla... on my way out to the car my cell rang, it was my younger brothers girl friend, Charity. On the phone, Charity told me that Joe had gotten hurt at work (Joe is a diesel technician at Ford) and was in the ER. It may have been the first time in my whole pessimistic life that I didn't think of the worse, in fact I didn't really think of anything serious at all. Charity did seem very shaken up on the phone so I said I would head over to be there with her, thinking she would need help through the ER processed and still not thinking that Joe was injured any serious way.

With in minutes of getting to the ER, I join Charity and my parents in the ER room at Joe's bedside. After getting the story from Joe and what little information we could pull from any medical professional that even looked at him, we stood together heartbroken.

Joe was working under a vehicle when the pry bar he was using came out of his hands and flung back at him. The bar was about a 3 inch diameter and it went straight through his eye. Everyone in the ER really had nothing good to say and gave us very little hope of saving his eye. Heartbroken, scared, uncertain



I can say we are so very blessed to live where we do. As small and isolated as our town is, we do have a amazing ophthalmology office that cares enough to be on call for our local hospital. We were told that is very rare for an ophthalmology office and if we lived anywhere else we would be making a appointment for him through the ophthalmology for a later time. The ophthalmologist that preformed Joe's first surgery was incredible. He took such good care of Joe and took the time with the very worried entourage of family that followed Joe through the hospital.

Joe kept his eye. He lost his lenses and his iris and had 28 stitches holding his very damaged eye together.

Joe spent a month in bed. In incredible pain. Dealing with nausea, dizziness and intense headaches. Because Joe no longer has an iris he can no longer regulate the light that is coming into his eye even with it swollen shut, and spent the days in his dark house.

A little over a month after the accident Joe went into a second surgery to relieve his eye of some to the remaining blood that was still trapped in his eye from the original surgery and to relieve Joe of some to the pharmaceuticals that have been necessary, but came with their own set of miserable side effects. The closest thing to relief that Joe had had in over a month. We were so relived to see Joe becoming Joe again.

After spending over a month in bed, Joe was ready to get out of the house and two weeks ago he told us that he wanted to go on a hike. INSPIRED!

Not knowing what to expect or what he would be capable of we chose a hike that staid close to civilization. We did the Ouray Perimeter hike. It was a wonderful and fun hike that took us for 4 miles around Ouray with beautiful views and a little of everything Ouray has to offer. Waterfalls, rivers, canyon views and wildflowers.

A smiles I have missed all summer.



Joe still needed to sit down from time to time on this hike and let some of his dizziness pass and milder forms a pain relief were still needed, but he went out there anyway.

We are all called to live this life to the fullest and I think sometimes we get caught up in what is the easiest and most comfortable and choose not to open our front door and breath in life. I have found myself doing just that thing so may times... " I was going to go for a run to day but it just seemed a little to hot" ..... "We were going to go on a hike today, but we didn't sleep well last night" Everyday is a gift and how dare I waist a single one.

Joe I am so very proud of you. Never in a million years would I think I would describe you in this way but, you have handled the last few months so gracefully and have handled the good and the bad so bravely. I am inspired to not view life in the ways it could be better, but to view life in the ways that is it so good.



Joe has some much more in front of him. Since this hike he has had a third surgery and there will be more to follow in the future. But I know I will continue to be impressed and inspired by my brother.

My Inspiration Part 1- So Very Capable

Every new parent has been there, staring into the face of their newborn child, thinking of the new full life in front of them. "They can do anything, they can be anything"

I guess I can't say for sure, I haven't questioned every new parent in the world, but I, myself, felt that way. With every new mile stone I saw my girls more and more capable of amazing lives in this world. As much as I know they capable of any accomplishment they set their sights on, they still seem to exceed my expectations every time.

Now my first born is five years old. She is under 4 feet tall, weighs 36 pounds and her legs are 16 inches long. Last weekend Hannah moved her 16 inch legs up 1852 foot climb to the top of Courthouse Mountain-elevation of 12,152 feet. Her first summit!!





When Hannah was three we camped at the trail head of Courthouse and hike the trail in the morning, she was able to make it half way up by herself and hiked back down again. I was confident now at 5 she would be capable hiking to the top and back down again. I did however come prepared with "rewards" to "encourage" her to complete. So with a bag full of gummy bears to bribe her.... I mean... encourage and reward her up the steep climb, we set off. Just as expected she reached the half way mark without an issue, just like she did when she was 3.





She ate a few cherries and she was ready to head up the rest of the trail that was unknown to her. Hannah insisted on being the line leader all the way up and to my surprise took very little drink breaks. The girl was on a mission (Task Master the 2nd generation).





The gummy bears were never needed, in fact they didn't even come out until we reached the summit, and not as a rewarded bribe but as a celebration that we all took part in. Once again she exceed my expectations and once again I looked at her on the peek and thought "you can do anything, you can be anything".



I'm so inspired to exceed my own exceptions, with her, Madalyn and myself.



WE ARE ALL SO VERY CAPABLE!

My Vision, His Back Breaking Labor

I think this has been going on for about a year. Well.. no... truly I have be loathing my laundry room for the last 6 1/2 years, but have been envisioning and planing a new laundry room for about a year. It is finally done and I hate doing laundry a little less now.

Here is the before pictures of my cave like laundry room...



How depressing is this!?!



There is nothing about my old laundry room that I miss.

We cleaned it out...



We gutted it (and by we, I mean he)


We (he) ripped out the flooring, painted, and laid tile.....



Josh and his dad built a platform for my washer and dryer that I can store my baskets under (using these plans) Josh built shelves and hung my laundry room art that I found on istock.com and my parents got me the the drying rack from Ballardsdesigns.com for my birthday.

I adore it

Independence

We had a wonderful Independence Day weekend. Our weekend started on Thursday when we headed up to Soap Creek to camp with the largest group of our fabulous camping friends. Eleven other families to be exact!













We headed out of Soap Creek late Sunday night and got home around midnight. After washing four days in the woods off of us we were happy to be in a bed again. The next morning we worked for a few hours getting unpacked and everything wash. We finished, looked around, and than agreed even after all that, we are ready to head back up and can't wait for our next camping trip.

Getting unpacked and cleaned up took most of our Independence Day, but I was still able to dress my girls in their 4th of July outfits and force them into picture taking.... which turned out like this.....



Oh that stubborn kid of mine!!!

Luckily it was about 1,000 degrees outside so Josh was willing to step up, be my hero and spray himself in the face with the hose to get results like this......





TA-DA!! Fourth of July cuteness!!







Our extremely hot day turned into the most perfect overcast and cool evening. My parents, John and Charity joined us on our back patio for steaks and baked potatoes. We shot off the fireworks we had left and passed the time before the town fireworks by perfecting our intoxicated cartwheel, the kids gave it a try too.

Here is Mom's mule kick cartwheel..



John's bent knee/tumble into my rose bush...



My toes that cartwheel along with me...



And the winner!! Dad had the most graceful of the intoxicated cartwheels!! Way to go Dad!







We finished our night together on the roof of our house watching Montrose's firework show. Truly blessed this year to be surrounded by so many friends and family!! A very Happy Independence Day Weekend!!